I’m Losing It


One day last week Brittany, the kids, and I were out spending the day together. I was driving as I normally do. That’s what manly men do right? They do the driving. It’s a given norm to our society. It’s not manly to let the female drive, right? Well, she drives on long trips because she loves to drive and I cant stand driving more than 23 minutes straight. Ok, I’m getting off task. It’s the A.D.D. in me I suppose hence the reason I don’t like to drive more than 23 minutes. Ok, back to the story.

I noticed Brittany kindly letting me know where parking spots were, letting me know about on coming traffic, when the light was green, and to not look at my phone while driving. Finally, I stopped, and abruptly said, “Who’s driving?” We just giggled and enjoyed our day but I may just have to look into having a new law passed and provide her with the first Back Seat Drivers License.

You see, I drive everywhere, every day of my life. Even when we are together as a family, I do most of the driving. But on this fine day, I noticed I couldn’t “just drive.” I had a beautiful assistant looking around for me, looking both ways for me, telling me when to stop, telling me I was going too fast, and “helping” me know when the light was green, all while she would hit the fake brake on her side, clinch the door and create a body language that communicated she was in the passenger seat with a Nascar driver. My wife is honestly a good driver but I have gotten so accustomed to driving that I ultimately had a very difficult time adhering to the support I was being offered.

It’s the same way in our daily lives isn’t it? We have gotten so accustomed to our routines, live in a society that caters to self, have built a culture of self-sufficiency, that it has created an obligation for control. Now in normal daily life, this is acceptable as it helps develop responsibility and commitment. However, it has created an ugly mammoth problem in the greatest aspect of our lives. Spiritually, we limit the power of God and settle in our faith because we feel the need to control so many aspects of our lives instead of surrendering them to the One who can do far more than us anyway.

We feel we must make things happen, make things work, fix problems, and have control over situations. This one is a difficult one for me because I tend to be a control freak. I have had to learn the hard way to render control to people who can perform the task better than I can. We see the need for control damages marriages, business relationships, ministries, and ultimately the Christian believers life in general.

Why is this the case? FEAR

We fear the unknown. We battle with what the outcome of a situation will look like if we don’t try to control it. We are afraid of what doors may open in the situation if we don’t steer it the way we think it needs to go.

What does this fear cause? SETTLING

When we don’t relinquish control into the hands of the King of Kings, it causes us to settle in our faith and miss the great opportunities He has designed for us. We don’t allow the Holy Spirit to do what only He can because we take the driver seat away from Him.

How can we squelch fear and stop the settling? Lose Control!

How To Lose Control

  1. Faith Feature!

Increase our faith! Faith is not just trusting in the Father but trusting in what you do not see.

In Acts 1:6-8 we see the disciples eager to know what Jesus has never told them and then we see a significant answer that not only applies to impacting the world but also impacting our personal lives so we can impact the world.

“Then they gathered around him and asked him, “Lord, are you at this time going to restore the kingdom to Israel?” He said to them: “It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.”

While the disciples had good intentions, this was forbidden knowledge for them to have because faith was needed. If he provided them with the knowledge right away, it would not require them to have faith.

  1. Create Courage

Increase our courage. Jesus provided the disciples with the training they needed for the journey ahead before He was crucified as well as after His resurrection. Now it was time for Jesus to return to the right hand of the Father and for the disciples to apply that training.

You see, God has provided us with the training and strength to be able to operate in any journey we have ahead of us. We don’t need to apply more to the journey in order to control it to align with what we believe the outcome should. Instead, we trust the Lord as we take the steps ahead of us and have the faith that in the unknown, He will carry out a much greater will than our own.

  1. Freedom Forever

Increase our freedom. Instead of living in bondage to the need for control in our lives, God desires for us to experience freedom. We only do that that when we lose control. Your life will be much less stressful because you are genuinely trusting the Lord. Your life will be more simplistic because you don’t have to know what is going to happen before it happens. You take the pressure off of yourself and place it in the Hands of the One who can and will take care of it.

When we learn to lose control, our relational vision, marital vision, leadership vision, ministry vision, and life vision will be greatly increased and focused.

Have a great day as you begin losing it!

My Wife Makes The Big Bucks


Ok, some of you may need to get your yack bag out. Its about to get sappy up in here.

There is absolutely no price that can be put on the phenomenal lady that I share my life with. She is the more precious than any pink star diamond ever to be discovered. When she blesses a room by her presence, it lights up like the Sirius star. The Sirius star is the brightest star in the sky by the way…Siriusly! She truly is my best friend and is the most significant human being I’ve every encountered.

I strive to communicate how insanely incredible she is and how special her life is but I’m going to step that up a notch to show this. I did some work in conjunction with salary.com who tallies what a stay-at-home mom would draw in a paycheck. So I tweaked a few things and here is what I came up with.

Job Title                                             Average Hours per week

Housekeeper                                     20

Cook                                                     15

Day Care Teacher                             12

Home School Teacher                    15

Facilities Manager                          11

Computer Operator                         5

Taxi Driver                                         8

Psychologist                                      9

Janitor                                                 8

Laundry Machine Operator          6

Chief Executive Officer                  3

Staff Nurse – RN                              2

Event Planner                                   3

Nutritionist                                       2

Logistics Analyst                             2

Interior Designer                             2

Bookkeeper                                       6

Administrative Assistant             2

General Maintenance Worker     2

TOTAL = 136 hours

What do employers pay for the same knowledge and skills that moms use every day?

Brittany Epps, for the 136 hours your serve your family (not including the many other hours and the insane of time you deal with my nutty self); your annual salary would be $164,682. Wow, you are so under paid.

That would be a paycheck of $3,166.96 per week.

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This is all just for fun, but it is definitely an eye-opener for us husbands.

Brittany, you are utterly amazing. Thank you! While I cant cut you a big fat check, I know that you don’t mind being paid with those priceless snuggle times with Eli, the ear to ear smiles from Natalee with her tongue sticking out, and the thousands of little moments you capture that confirm your calling as a stay-at-home mom. I am forever grateful for you. I love you!

To all the other stay-at-home mom’s…

God Bless you and thank you for investing many exhausting hours into your incredible little ones.

Proverbs 31:10-31 (NLT)

10 Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?

She is more precious than rubies.

11 Her husband can trust her,

and she will greatly enrich his life.

12 She brings him good, not harm,

all the days of her life.


13 She finds wool and flax

and busily spins it.

14 She is like a merchant’s ship,

bringing her food from afar.

15 She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household

and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.


16 She goes to inspect a field and buys it;

with her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17 She is energetic and strong,

a hard worker.

18 She makes sure her dealings are profitable;

her lamp burns late into the night.


19 Her hands are busy spinning thread,

her fingers twisting fiber.

20 She extends a helping hand to the poor

and opens her arms to the needy.

21 She has no fear of winter for her household,

for everyone has warm[b] clothes.


22 She makes her own bedspreads.

She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.

23 Her husband is well known at the city gates,

where he sits with the other civic leaders.

24 She makes belted linen garments

and sashes to sell to the merchants.


25 She is clothed with strength and dignity,

and she laughs without fear of the future.

26 When she speaks, her words are wise,

and she gives instructions with kindness.

27 She carefully watches everything in her household

and suffers nothing from laziness.


28 Her children stand and bless her.

Her husband praises her:

29 “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,

but you surpass them all!”


30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;

but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised.

31 Reward her for all she has done.

Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.